Articulating Aloha in your Language of Intention

When I coach managers and leaders who have made the commitment to manage with aloha, one of the first things I do is ask them to describe aloha for me the way they interpret it. When they use the word with the people they manage, their intention must be understood so that their expectations of aloha-filled performance are clear, in other words, there must be clarity in the workplace about their Language of Intention.

How can anyone take your cue if they aren’t sure what you mean?

There is kaona, i.e. hidden meaning, associated with every word you choose to use: You speak with a certain understanding of the word’s definition. When you speak it repeatedly, you put forth expectations for those you manage, that their performance is expected to match up to your definition.

Your Language of Intention. Critically important.

So tell me, practice with us here, or send me a private email if you prefer, and would like some quick private coaching:

How do you describe aloha? What are the phrases about it you will add to your own coaching arsenal when you talk story about it with those you manage?

I’ll give you some of mine to get you started in thinking about this. Quick brainstorm; These are things I say about aloha all the time.

—Aloha in its purest form is unconditional love of who you are. There is no one else like you.
—Aloha is an attitude. Yours. On display for all to see your character in your personality.
—Aloha helps you trust when you feel everyone you work with lives with aloha too, just as you do.
—There is an abundance mentality in Aloha. When we witness a person’s born-in goodness, their good intention is contagious and infectious.
—Aloha is about self-esteem. Self-talk becomes healthy and reaffirming to your spirit.
—When there is aloha in the workplace there is no fear. Everything feels safer, for there is no fear of repercussion. Pretty liberating. Pretty empowering.
—Aloha is a love of other people, and the desire to have good relationships with them. The world would be a pretty desolate place if you were the only person on it.
—Aloha is something you give first, and then magically, you experience receiving it. “You cannot hold a torch to light another’s path without also illuminating your own!”
—Aloha is a source of energy. When you suddenly realize that your Aloha is like a bottomless well within you, immense new energy is created, like a brand new lease on life.

Sidebar:

A suggested exercise. What follows are longer phrases from my coaching other managers and leaders. How would you re-write them for the people you manage, and in your voice, in a staff meeting conversation starter?

Added clarity, added incentive! Remember our January Ho‘ohana on Ho‘omau? Review pages 59 (from the heading, Fewer words, more meaning) to the middle of page 61 in MWA. As you do the suggested exercise in this sidebar, visualize a future with your staff where you are able to say “Ho‘omau” as just one word, meaning “Harness the aloha you know I believe you have. You know what to do. I believe in you, and I trust you. You are perfect for this.” Very powerful.

—This is the beauty of Aloha: Aloha is within all of us, it is something we were born with. It is a feeling; a stirring in one’s soul that begs to be shared; a spirit as real as anything you can physically touch. You needn’t have been born in Hawaii to have it, or to manage with it, but when thought of as a value held in high esteem, what Aloha teaches can help you live it.

—As a manager, you do not train someone in using aloha as an acquired skill: You create a workplace where the aloha which may be dormant within them for some reason, will bubble to the surface of all they do because they feel good about celebrating it. They feel safe, appreciated, and passionate about their work, believing their work is values and worthwhile. They become a star on the stage you have created for them to perform on— with genuine passion and joy. You can hear their heart singing.

—Aloha is about your attitude. Understanding Aloha is about accepting that you are a good person and capable of great things. You are not alone, and your Aloha also helps you look for and recognize the good in everyone else too. Embracing Aloha, and committing to it as a new attitude within which you will live and work first, enables you to celebrate the spirit which burns inside you through improved relationships with others. Thus Aloha is the best place to start for those who seek to manage well and lead others.

And how about the word itself? For those of you who like more literal meanings, this was the “better explanation” of aloha I put in my ChangeThis manifesto at the urging of a caring mentor of mine:

Aloha is very abundant, and it’s found universally, not just in Hawaii. In fact, I’m certain you’ve got it in you.

Aloha refers to the spirit within; it is the steady breathing of your life, the voice of your soul. Aloha can be literally translated as “the breath of pure life within you”. A person’s alo (ah-lo) is their presence, and their ha (hah) is their breath while it is still pure, meaning it has not yet been exhaled and mingled with anything else.

One’s inner spiritual power taps into this ha as a wellspring. In the Hawaiian culture, Aloha is assumed to be in everyone and it is celebrated. Managing with Aloha is about tapping into this pure spirit of good possibility that is inside you — and around you in everyone else. Aloha embraces your intuition and gut-level feelings — it gives you credit for having them, and it encourages you to listen to them.

The most accurate definition for Aloha itself is unconditional love.

Here’s another way to say this:

Think of aloha as living from the inside out. Last 2 letters: ha, the breath of your life. You capture the very essence of who you are - no one in the world is like you! When you “catch your breath” you capture the authentic, true, real and genuine you. First 3 letters: alo, your demeanor, the stage presence you put forth for everyone to see. All 5 letters: aloha. Does your outside match your inside? Is your demeanor a reflection of the positive good inside you, and have you captured all your born-in talents? Are you sincerely living, working, managing, and leading from the inside out?

This is your Jumpstart. Now you try it.

Related article: Ho‘omau and the Language of Intention

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Aloha, the Intent of Great Managers - our February Ho‘ohana.